I love New Year’s Eve. Truly. We’re all so full of optimism that – as of tomorrow – life will be done screwing with us for a while. As if life works on our schedule and knows that it needed to get it out of its system by today because if it gave us a royally screwed 2018, then we’re entitled to a hiatus for 2019. Fingers crossed.
With that in mind, time for the time-honored tradition of making ourselves promises that run empty faster than our champagne bottle. Here are my Amended and Restated New Year’s Resolutions:
less alcoholmore water.
the house cleanthe robot vacuum charged.
- Answer the phone when your daughter calls sometimes.
- Stop binging on Netflix in excess of four (4) hours.
- Read more books without vampires in them.
a bookanother book.
- Never give up still.
- Be kind but stay away from assholes.
- Don’t focus on the ups and downs just be grateful for the ride.
Thanks, 2018. It’s been weird.