Tag: good reads

All’s Fair in Love and Book Reviews.

I read an article by an author who said never – never – read reviews of your book online.

Okay, but did he mean like never ever? Or just kind of never? Because never seems sort of impossible, right? (For a slightly neurotic, first-time author like me it proved to be, anyway.)

And I looked. That’s right. I read them all.

Here’s the funny thing about reviews of your book – a good review makes you smile and puts a spring in your step. For about a day.

A bad review is like that popcorn kernel that gets stuck between your tooth and gum that you can’t seem to dislodge no matter how hard you try…because the popcorn kernel is in your soul. Giving you something to poke at late at night when you’re trying to sleep.

So even though there are substantially more good reviews out there, the few bad ones are the ones that got under my skin. Which is probably why that author said DO NOT READ THEM! A-ha. If only I had the ability to listen to sage advice when it is presented to me.

Oh well. Some of the good ones make it all worth while.

Lisa over at LostInLit called it “Hilarious, Witty and Quite Charming.” And Lisa (I know – I’m winning with ‘Lisas”!) over at LisaLovesLiterature gave it 5 stars! And Becky on Goodreads said I “hit it out of the park!” Megan over at ReadingBooksLikeaBoss added me to her “Book Recommendations” tab! And then I found this young woman who goes by The Lone Reader who did a very funny and enthusiastic video blog about it. If I can make anyone rattle on that fast about my book, I certainly should be able to overlook a few naysayers.

So if *you* have read my book – and liked it – please leave me a review 🙂  (And I’ll try to keep myself from reading it). If you read it and didn’t like it – my name is spelled N-i-c-h-o-l-a-s-S-p-a-r-k-s. Be sure to get that part right.

 

The Funniest Things I’ve Ever Read…

Top-5 style.

1. The first five to ten Stephanie Plum novels. I don’t have examples, but there was repeated LOL’ing…and misguided attempts to read funny passages, out of context, to my unamused husband. Yes, I’m still a Stephanie Plum devotee – mostly because if Janet Evanovich gets that hilarious again, I don’t want to miss it.

2. The Bloggess – And That’s Why You Should Learn to Pick Your Battles. I love this chick.  And this bit made me cry. Three words: knock knock motherfu**er.

3. Dave Barry defining the term TMI in this detailed description of his close encounters of the butt kind.

4. F U Penguin. The book, not the blog. Only because I bought the book before hearing of the blog. But the book is just shit from the blog…and here’s a snippet for your reading pleasure.

This bear is essentially raping my soul

So basically this totally thoughtless motherfucker decided regular bears weren’t cute enough. His solution? GIVE HIMSELF NATURAL FUCKING EYEGLASSES. Then, becoming the single cutest animal on the face of the earth, he laid on his fucking back so we could all see his goddamn belly, and then furtively glanced in our direction, thereby rendering any potential defense against his advances totally useless. Well played, Bear. I’m going to go take a shower now.

5. Shit My Dad Says. It’s a book. It’s a Twitter account. It’s effing hilarious.

“Sometimes life leaves a hundred dollar bill on your dresser, and you don’t realize until later that it’s because it fucked you.”

I’m sure as soon as I hit “publish” I’ll remember some other gut-wrenchingly funny thing I read…that I’ll just keep to myself.

Let’s hear it.  What made you laugh till you cried??